Steps into Parenthood: lost...

I came home yesterday evening to find my wife Patchwork curled up in bed - she had been feeling grotty for the last couple of days and I have to admit I had suspected the news she had to share.

Steps into Parenthood: lost...: I started a new job today and I'm sure there are all these feelings of how much fun it was and how nice the people were that I'm supposed to...

Having had some time to sleep on it, I can still only describe by response as emotional and confused.  It seems strange to mourn the loss of someone that you didn't know existed but grief is certainly one emotion I'm trying to unravel from the mess.  Bizarrely, hope and optimism are amongst the others - horrible though the it is to cope with the thought that we have just lost a child, the fact that he/she was there in the first place, has renewed all my hopes that we might become biological parents - confusingly at time when I have come to accept the thought that we won't.  Sprinkle into the mix feelings of worry, concern and care for Patchwork at a time that is even harder for her and add a dash of 'Must be strong for my wife' and you have a recipe for tumultuous emotions.